By FMT Reporters
PETALING JAYA: With the issue of marital rape coming under intense debate recently, the Mufti of Perlis, Mohd Asri Zainul Abidin, took to Facebook today to shed some light on what was permissible and what was not in regard to the issue of sex between a married couple in the eyes of Islam.
Saying “rough and painful sex is prohibited in Islam”, Mohd Asri added that it was therefore important that every couple find what worked best between them sexually so that each could find gratification in the act.
“Nevertheless, sex between a husband and wife should take place in a harmonious setting without there being any hurt inflicted on each other. This fulfils the command of the Quran: (translated) “You all live with them (wives) in a good way.” (Surah al-Nisa: 19),” his Facebook posting read.
The delicate subject of coitus interruptus was also discussed at length with Mohd Asri pointing out that while withdrawing before ejaculation was permissible according to the hadith, it was important a husband obtained his wife’s agreement to ensure she had time to enjoy the sexual experience also.
Once again, the reference to Islam’s prohibition of marital rape was reinforced when he wrote: “It shows that forced or rough sexual intercourse where one party does not enjoy it, is prohibited in marital relations.”
That said, the issue of refusing to have sex was touched upon. According to Mohd Asri, it was as much a sin for a husband to refrain from having sex with his wife as it was for her to refuse sex with him unless both had valid reasons to substantiate their actions.
“The wife has the right to refuse her husband sexually if sexual intercourse with him would result in harm should her husband have AIDS or other diseases that could endanger her health,” he wrote, adding a wife also had the right to refuse sex if her husband failed to fulfil his responsibilities of financially supporting her.
He also said that in Islam, love and affection formed the basis of a relationship between a husband and his wife as mentioned in Surah al-Rum verse 21.
“So all the hadiths related to the husband and wife must be interpreted in the context and panorama of love and affection.
“Any interpretation that is not against this backdrop, would mean that there is a misunderstanding of the meaning of the Prophet’s hadith about marital relations. – FMT